What we remember

7th September, 2009 - Posted by janebeard - 2 Comments

Think back to when you’ve been in the audience for a live presentation — in the same room with the speaker, not watching on TV.

What’s the first one that springs to mind? And what is about that presentation that was memorable? What did you like/not like about it?

For Jane, the answer would be a eulogy given for a friend by his mother. It was one of the most moving talks I’ve ever heard. What made it wonderful was that she was genuinely reminding us that we all mattered to David, and that he mattered to us. She reminded us that we are all connected in ways fundamental and etheric. That David was both happy and unhappy, difficult and unsurpassingly generous, all in the same person … as we all have the capacity to be. That humans share molecules of breath with every other human on earth over the span of 28 day.

That she was David’s mother was key. But what mattered most was her determination to remind us that David lives in each of his friends, and that she was grateful to us for loving her son. She was in grief, but she put that aside to speak, as a mother, to the friends of her son. I’ll never forget it as long as I live.

For Jeff: (I was at that funeral too and was equally moved by her talk.) Lou Holtz, the former college football coach, who has been doing motivational speeches for years, spoke at the last meeting I staged. I have seen him many times and am always impressed. He is authentic, clear, funny and motivational. His speech is canned, but what is not canned is a genuine desire to impact his audience in a meaningful way. It is who he is. He is a coach who loved his kids and wanted their experience with him to help them succeed in life. This desire is still alive in him and it fueled this talk I witnessed. We felt his love of us and his genuine wish that we take something from him and that it help us succeed.

What’s true in all presentations is that we all share molecules of breath in the course of a speech, whether it’s good or bad. That thought alone may change the way you experience the next presentation you see. Or give!

So what’s your memory? Good or bad? Share it with us.

2 Comments

Bob Lazar

September 8th, 2009 at 2:30 PM    


In May, I heard Debra Dunsire, MD accept “The Woman of the Year” award from the Healthcare Businesswomen’s Association at their yearly award dinner. It was moving and emotional. It painted memorable pictures without a single PowerPoint slide. It moved me enough to send my spouse and daughter to the website to read the speech.

At the core of her speech she said:
“Work needs to be a THREAD in the tapestry of life. However great the job, a monotone tapestry made
of only one thread cannot match the richness of interwoven colors and textures.

For me, that core purpose encompasses all the things I am most passionate about: Building a strong
family founded in faith and working as part of a team to achieve healing in life threatening diseases
where there are not adequate answers.

What does having real clarity on those key drivers – the “must have’s”- mean for our work? Well, it
helps us make clear decisions on career steps and avoid a couple of missteps we all have seen some
others make.

For instance:
• Being clear about the “must have” components of the type of work allows us not to be flattered
into doing something that doesn’t fit our passions, even when it appears to be progress. For
example, a promotion that typically seems like such a good thing to do but takes you to a kind of
work or team that isn’t a fit for your unique passions.

• Knowing how you want to make your unique contribution allows the freedom to take some risk,
take the path less travelled. If it matches with your passion, your core purpose, you can embrace
disruptive change and go for it! I’ve found real power in asking myself: “What’s the worst thing
that could happen?” If the opportunity matches your core purpose and if the answer to that key
question does not involve loss of a loved one, it’s probably a new door opening!”

It was a great and moving speech and one I will remember for a long while to come.

Christine Intagliata

September 10th, 2009 at 12:06 PM    


As someone who has organized many conferences in my volunteer life, I experienced a floor of memories prompted by your question: the speaker who accompanied himself beating on a drum through part of his talk (I liked it); the scholar who used up most of his time by reading the children’s book his wife wrote because he obviously had not prepared anything else (I certainly did NOT like it!); and most recently, the keynoter (actress, author and adoption advocate Alison Larkin) who wore a funny costume, sang an original song, and made us all laugh (about adoption, a topic we normally take VERY seriously). Clearly, this is a woman who likes to get a laugh and likes to be the center of attention. But underneath that, her belief in the rights of adoptees and her commitment to bringing her audience to that belief (through humor) was crystal clear — and persuasive!

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